Monday, 31 March 2008

XFM: You're No Fun Anymore!

by Charles Pooter

What happened to you XFM? You're no fun anymore. You use to be cool, man. You gave Ricky his break. He introduced the world to the brain of Karl Pilkington. You gave Adam and Joe their own show, when everyone else thought of them as just those blokes who made lame movie parodies using Star Wars toys.

Now you're just a whore for the Government. Every advert break you offer a succession of preachy messages from the regime: hepatitis, tax returns ("tax doesn't have to be taxing" - YES IT DOES, IT'S TAX! You goddamn, pink-latex-wearing, bicycle-riding tit), smoking, Jebus know what else... God forbid you might advertise a good or service we might actually want to buy once in a while.

One would be forgiven for thinking your core demographic had no disposable incomes, just empty brains ready to absorb Government propaganda. As you are obviously pretty much entirely state-funded these days: why not just rename yourselves "BBC X"? You could get your money from the licence fee and then at least we wouldn't need to listen to the mind-numbing public information bullshit between the rock music that you still occasionally play.

XFM: You're no fun anymore!

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